Healing the Spiritual Wounds of Sexual Abuse
by Lynda Wisdo, MA
(essay written for MA course in Sexuality and the Soul)
Copyright © 2023 All rights reserved.
Within all of the world’s major religions, there have been teachings that maintain that the body and spirit are two separate aspects of the human experience. Moreover, many of these teachings also maintain that sexuality and spirit are not only separate but aspects of our being that are at war with each other. In his gospel, the apostle Paul warns Christians that, “The desires of the flesh are against the spirit, and the desires of the spirit are against the flesh” (Bonheim, 1992, p.9). This proclamation, along with numerous others presented in many sacred texts, has convinced religious followers of all faiths that there can be no reconciliation between these two “battling forces” within us, a belief which has left many of the world’s devoted feeling separated from the experiences of their bodies. According to some more recent authors and researchers, however, and the beliefs of many ancient cultures, sexuality and spirituality are not separate but are instead intimately connected aspects of our being, aspects of our being which have been playing a vital role in the spiritual growth of individuals as well as in the evolution of all of humankind for thousands of years.
In the legend of Gilgamesh, ancient storytellers describe how it was through the energies of sexuality that the man-beast, Enkidu came to be transformed into a “god-like” or “spiritual” being, a transformation which then enabled Enkidu to enter the gates of the “civilized” world (Wade, 2004, p. 3). In her book, Transcendent Sex, researcher and author Jenny Wade, describes dozens of contemporary experiences of spiritual awakening and transcendence which have been occurring for people of all ages and from all walks of life through the simple act of lovemaking. Much like the enlightenment experiences of spiritual adepts, these sexual-spiritual events have included feelings of bliss, journeys to past life incarnations, and even glimpses of the face of God (Wade, 2004, p. 11-13). In addition to its ability to carry lovers into other realms of consciousness, based on theories presented by researcher Dr. John Kappas, human sexuality also plays a much more basic role in humankind’s day-to-day experiences, providing the energy behind the way each one of us expresses ourselves, not only in the bedroom but within every aspect of our being, from how we walk and talk, to how we dress, and even how we write our names (Kappas, 2001, p. 72).
When considering the many simple and profound ways in which the energies of sexuality are experienced within every aspect of human life, it becomes apparent that it is not something which is antagonistic to or even separate from spirituality but something to which spirituality is intimately linked, both of these energies informing and recreating each other as well as each one of us on an ongoing basis. Interwoven within this intimate link is a very distinct type of sexual experience, one which appears to be far removed from the transcendent experiences presented by Wade as well as from the evolutionary experience of Enkidu but, given the power inherent within sexual energies, is just as influential to our spirituality and the unfolding of creation--the experience of sexual abuse.
An all too common type of abuse, today statistics reveal that one in three to five women and one in seven to ten men will be sexually abused before the age of seventeen (2006, Rates of Sexual Abuse in Adults section, para 1). This means that at least 20% of underage girls and 10% of underage boys will experience any or all of the following events, either forcibly or coercively, at the hands of an adult, in most instances, an adult who they know and trust: exhibitionism, fondling or molestation, viewing of sexual acts or pornography, participation in pornography or prostitution, oral rape, sodomy or incest (2006, What is Sexual Abuse section, para 1). Because of the especially charged nature of sexual abuse and its ability to affect the most intimate aspect of our being--our soul aspect--the aftereffects of this type of abuse can be especially devastating, not only in how a survivor experiences her/himself inwardly but in how s/he relates outwardly in the world as well. For the most part, these aftereffects arise in a variety of challenges most commonly referred to in Western medicine as “mental illnesses”.
Depression. Anxiety. Bipolar Disorder. Schizophrenia. Substance Abuse. PTSD. These are just some of the “mental illnesses” that can result when an individual has suffered sexual abuse, a correlation which has been well documented and studied by some of the world’s most prestigious research centers. In recent studies conducted at the University of Melbourne and the University of NSW, researchers have found that the rate of mental illness in survivors of sexual abuse is up to three times that of the general population. As noted by Australian public health expert, Dr. Susan Rees, “…there’s a high association or a strong association between exposure to gender-based violence and all 3 broad classes of mental disorder-- so that includes mood, anxiety, substance abuse-- and a very high association with attempted suicide” (Edwards, 2011, para 1-3). In another study conducted in British Columbia, researchers have found that an overwhelming proportion of adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse, up to 95%, develop mental illness, at least half of these illnesses presenting as some form of PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and 40% as substance abuse (2006, Effects of Sexual Abuse section, para 1). Certainly, these numbers represent not only the startling statistics regarding the aftereffects of sexual abuse but more importantly, the very real struggles which affect the well-being of both individual survivors and our entire culture. Based on a decade- long study conducted at the Department of Preventative Medicine at Kaiser Permanente in conjunction with the US Centers of Disease Control, Dr. Vincent Felitti notes that “adverse childhood experiences (such as sexual abuse) are common, destructive and have an effect that often lasts a lifetime [and] They are the most important determinant of the health and well-being of our nation” (2006, para 4). Given the extent to which incidents of childhood sexual abuse have risen to epidemic proportions and the many ways in which their aftereffects are contributing to some of our most pressing individual and societal challenges-- challenges such as ongoing abuse/violence, poverty, crime and drug and alcohol abuse-- the need to effectively address this type of abuse as well as its aftereffects has become crucial, not only to the health and well-being of individual survivors, but to all of society.
While the majority of Western health practitioners have traditionally dealt with the aftereffects of sexual abuse in terms of various types of “mental illnesses”, there are many survivors, authors and even clinicians who, being aware of the intimate link between sexuality and spirituality, have come to view these struggles more in terms of “spiritual wounding”. In her online article, “How Sexual Abuse is Spiritual Abuse”, social worker, Cathy Chapman discusses the idea that because sexuality and spirituality are not only interconnected but also the two most sacred aspects of our being, when a person experiences sexual abuse s/he also experiences “spiritual violence” (2010, para 1). Chapman goes on to point out that because one of the most vital aspects of spirituality is the trust each believer has that s/he is connected to some sort of divine force, when that trust is broken, as it is in sexual abuse, the survivor becomes unable to feel that connection and as a result, has difficulty achieving a sense of “inner direction and power” in her/his life (2010, para 4). It is when this loss of “inner direction and power” becomes severe that the struggles or “symptoms” of spiritual wounding or “mental illness” become especially challenging.
In the book, The Sexual Healing Journey, an abuse survivor named, Angie describes her feelings of loss after her father insisted that she undress for him one afternoon when she was a teenager: “I felt like I no longer had power over anything. I had lost the power of protection over my own body…Sex came to represent domination, emotional pain, and a feeling of spiritual death” (1991, Maltz, p. 92-93). All too often treated like “sexual objects” by their perpetrators, many abuse survivors come to view themselves as being completely devoid of spirituality, their sense of themselves as “individuals with feelings, needs and rights” taken from them in order to fulfill the needs their abusers. Understandably, anytime an individual’s spiritual system of “inner direction and power” has been broken down by an episode or string of episodes of sexual abuse, any number of “mental illnesses” can result; the very basis of these illnesses being the deeper spiritual wounding that has been caused by the abuse and the connection between that abuse, the survivor’s sexuality and her/his spirit. Some of the “symptoms” or challenges that can arise as a result of the abuse survivor’s spiritual wounding or “mental illness” include: dissociative responses, sleep disturbances, flashbacks, concentration difficulties, memory problems, hyper-alertness, irrational guilt, sexual dysfunction, eating disorders, substance abuse, compulsive sexuality, self-destructive behaviors, self-mutilation, a tendency toward isolation, impaired self-esteem, depression, negative perceptions of the self and others, and a likelihood of attempting suicide which is twice as high as those without a history of sexual abuse (Dolan, 1991, p.5-6).
While, for the most part, Western medicine encourages the use of psychotropic medications, psychotherapy and psychiatric hospitalization as a way of dealing with many of the challenges faced by sexual abuse survivors, this approach is primarily “mind-centered” and far too often fails to address the ways in which the survivor’s body and spirit were also affected by the abuse. It is because of the way traditional psychotherapy often fails to address the body and soul aspects of the survivor that psychotherapist, Blanche Landry, also an incest survivor, decided to turn to a more holistic type of therapy in her efforts to heal from the aftereffects of her abuse. It was through this more holistic approach that Landry was encouraged to work not only with her mind during her healing but with her “heart, body and soul” as well. Based on her experiences with both traditional and holistic therapies in healing from the aftereffects of sexual abuse, Landry found the limits of traditional psychotherapy to include the following:
-Its emphasis on rational intelligence while excluding the other three types (physical, emotional and spiritual).
-Its emphasis on university-based training which relies primarily on concepts developed by
Freud, a man who did not believe his patients when they said they had been sexually abused
by their fathers and instead insisted that they were fantasizing (an attitude which still persists
today and which prevents an honest appraisal of the true impact of sexual abuse on the
individual, the family and on society).
-Its treatment of spirituality as “taboo”, an attitude which has also been influenced by Freud, in this case by his atheism. (2001, para 9-10).
Since it is through the body that the wounds of sexual abuse are inflicted on the survivor--on her/his mind, body and spirit--without question the body should also be included in the process of working to heal those wounds. By not addressing the body, it is my belief that, in some instances, traditional psychotherapy can actually work to maintain a state of dissociation in the survivor--a split between the mind, body and spirit which, as will be discussed later, may already be extremely problematic for many survivors.
In her online article, “Healing from Sexual Abuse Trauma with Spirituality”, Landry stresses the importance of giving the sexual abuse survivor the opportunity to work with all four types of intelligence--physical, emotional, rational, and spiritual--through a method she refers to as the “Psychological- Physical- Spiritual Approach”. In her article, Landry presents the numerous benefits that can be gained from working with this method and with the four types of intelligence in healing the wounds of sexual abuse as follows:
-Physical Intelligence- allows the survivor to get in touch with feelings, blocks, and traumas within the body.
-Emotional Intelligence- allows the survivor to acknowledge how s/he feels about her/his bodily sensations/reactions.
-Rational Intelligence- allows the survivor to observe and judge her/his experiences and make connections between the past and present.
-Spiritual Intelligence- involves the soul in helping the survivor to re-experience her/his wounds and live through them with a new state of awareness. (2001, para 13-14).
Naturally, when the survivor is given the opportunity to address all four types of intelligence in her/his healing through this type of multi-dimensional approach, s/he will stand a much better chance of achieving a sense of wholeness than when utilizing only the “mind-centered” approaches of traditional psychotherapy. This is not to say that the traditional approaches should not be utilized; as Landry emphatically points out, efforts to heal through the three other types of intelligence--physical, emotional, and spiritual--should be considered as complementary to the more traditional approaches which address the mind. Basically a “transpersonal approach” to healing, Landry’s “Psychological- Physical- Spiritual Approach” places much of its emphasis on the many benefits that can be gained through “inner process” work such as meditation and contemplation. It is through these “inner processes” that Landry believes the survivor will be best able to connect with her/his “divine essence”, a step she feels to be of the utmost importance when working to heal the deeper spiritual wounds of sexual abuse (2001, para 15).
Another way for the sexual abuse survivor to connect with her/his spirituality or “divine essence” is to utilize some of the “energetic approaches” to healing. According to Vicki Thompson in her online article “Spiritually Healing Abuse”, the energetic approaches are based on the theory that each one of us possesses an “inner energy network” which is comprised of four “energy fields” that surround the body and which connect us to the “divine healing energy”. Corresponding directly to the four types of intelligence described by Landry, moving outward from the body, Thompson describes this energy network as including the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual energetic fields or bodies--energy fields which are often presented in spiritual discussions as auras. According to Thompson, the intention when working with these energy fields is to release “old” and “stuck” energies that are related to the abuse so as to enable the survivor to reconnect with the energies of the higher- self or spirit. This type of energetic work is considered to be spiritual or transpersonal in that it focuses on dimensions which lie outside of or above the survivor’s everyday consciousness. As Thompson tells readers, it is by releasing the old, abuse-related patterns from the energy bodies that the survivor is able to “free up space” within her/his energy system and make room for the divine source of “spiritual healing guidance” to come in-- a process quite similar to deleting the old files on one’s computer in order to “free up space” for new ones (Thompson, 2002, para 1-7).
While there are many sexual abuse survivors who, being aware of their abuse histories, are able to make a connection between their mental and spiritual struggles and their abuse, there are a surprising number of survivors who cannot. This is because many survivors are unable to remember their abuse and are left only with its challenging aftereffects. These survivors are said to be struggling with a condition known as traumatic or dissociative amnesia or, if the abuse was especially severe, dissociative identity. Dissociation is described as “an extreme defense reaction to inescapable trauma” where survivors may have no memories at all of their abuse or even of entire periods of their childhoods (Dolan, 1991, 141). For these survivors, there are no incidents of abuse to cite as the cause for their struggles, struggles that, as mentioned earlier, may include nightmares, eating disorders, substance abuse, and tendencies toward self-mutilation and suicide. For the dissociated survivor, there are only the aftereffects of her/his abuse and the intense feelings of confusion and hopelessness that can result when no cause or treatment can be found for them.
In his book, Separated from the Light, founder and director of the Women’s Institute for Incorporation Therapy, Dr. William Tollefson, discusses how he sees the process that leads to a dissociative reaction as being one which is occurring on a soul or spirit level. Most basic to Tollefson’s model is his view of the way in which, unable to escape an act of abuse, the mind, body and spirit of the emotionally overwhelmed child will “link up” with her/his imagination to create an “alternative path for survival”. Once this alternative path is created, the mind, body and spirit “sever connections so that the traumatic physical and emotional pain happening to the body don’t register in the mind” (1997, p. 128). Even though this “splitting” of the self is done to protect and preserve the “core”--the most fundamental part of the “self”--because of the displaced containment of the memories and emotions related to the abuse as well as various manipulative tools used by the perpetrator, this “splitting” also creates a “conflicted relationship” between the divided aspects of the psyche. It is because of these conflicts, the unprocessed memories and emotions and the survivor’s inability to access and release them that, even though the dissociated survivor is unable to remember her/his abuse, the struggles of spiritual wounding still arise, often presenting even greater challenges than for the non-dissociated survivor who is able to recall the reason for her/his struggles.
It is important to keep in mind that the process involved in dissociation is one that happens on a continuum or graduated scale, the earliest stages such as day-dreaming being common to most everyone. During a classroom lecture, for instance, a state of simple boredom can lead a third grade student to imagine that s/he is flying high above the school on the wings of a gentle dragon, a dissociated state from which the child can easily return to ordinary consciousness. It is when a child is experiencing severe and/or repeated trauma, however, such as in sexual abuse, that the dissociative reaction continues along the continuum, forcing a compartmentalization of experiences to begin taking place within the psyche along with dissociated states which may take years to bring back into ordinary consciousness. Always a spiritual “rescuing” of the self, it is at the far end of the continuum where the dissociated survivor experiences what Tollefson refers to as a “multiplicity reaction”, formerly described as Multiple Personality Disorder and currently as Dissociative Identity Disorder. According to Tollefson, this extreme reaction occurs only if the victim has already experienced all of the previous stages along the dissociation continuum including: daydreaming, the dissociative reaction, out- of- body experiences, and compartmentalization and fragmentation-- all occurring primarily as the result of “sexual and physical abuse before the age of seven” (1997, p.138).
While there are many different ways of working with the distinct and difficult challenges caused by dissociation, there are no medications currently available that are able to address the dissociation directly, only some of its co-occurring conditions such as depression and anxiety. It is for this reason that many therapists advocate utilizing some of the more holistic methods such as those presented by Landry and Thompson when working with the dissociated survivor. One of these holistic-based therapists, Dr. Renee Fredrickson, director of Fredrickson Associates and co-director of Chrysalis Recovery Center, presents some of her findings in working effectively with dissociated sexual abuse survivors in her book titled, Repressed Memories, A Journey of Recovery from Sexual Abuse. In this book, Fredrickson discusses five types of memory which she believes make up the human memory system, a system which corresponds closely with the four types of intelligence and energetic fields presented earlier by Landry and Thompson. These types of memory include: Recall Memory, which is the memory process of the conscious or rational mind, Feeling Memory, which is the memory process of the subconscious/emotional mind, Body Memory, which comes from the subconscious/physical mind, and Imagistic and Acting-Out Memory which can be traced to the subconscious/spiritual mind (Fredrickson, 1992, p.88). According to Fredrickson, it is within the subconscious that all of the memories that the conscious mind is “incapable of storing” are stored. This includes early memories of events that happen before our Recall Memory is fully developed as well as memories of abuse that are “extremely traumatic”. Since very few dissociated survivors experience spontaneous Recall Memories of their abuse--memories that are accompanied by the “lived experience” of the events presented in a logical sequence-- traumatic memories which are stored within the subconscious can only be brought into conscious awareness through the subconscious forms of memory: Feeling, Body, Imagistic, and Acting-Out Memory. When any of these four types of memory begin to emerge, they usually emerge in combination and are experienced in the following ways:
Feeling Memory- as a “flood of inexplicable emotion”, usually surrounding
an issue or “trigger” related to the abuse.
Body Memory- as the physical manifestation of a past incident of abuse. For example, a
survivor’s legs may begin to shake as s/he is remembering the look on a perpetrator’s face.
Imagistic Memory- often arises as a memory that breaks through into conscious
awareness in the form of an image or “incomplete picture” of events, similar to a slide
show. (Also in dreams).
Acting-Out Memory- arises when a forgotten incident of abuse is spontaneously acted out in some way,
physically, emotionally or verbally. The most common form of this type of
memory is when an abuse survivor suddenly says something about her/his abuse that s/he
had no intention of saying. (Fredrickson, 1992, p.88-95).
Understandably, when fragments of past sexual abuse begin emerging from the subconscious through any one of these channels when there is still no conscious memory of that abuse, it can be extremely disturbing to the survivor, creating a type of “spiritual crisis” within her/his psyche. It is because of the unsettling nature of emerging dissociated memories that the dissociated survivor should always have adequate professional support during her/his healing. Because of the spiritual nature of the dissociation, as well as the deeply transformative potential of the emerging memories, it is in the best interest of the survivor that this support include someone with a background in managing spiritual and transformative crises related to past sexual abuse.
It is important to keep in mind that the dissociated survivor cannot force her/his memories to emerge. As pointed out by Fredrickson, “You can help your memories surface, but you cannot make them surface”. When memories do start to emerge, the task all survivors must undertake is to “piece together” a picture of their abuse history by combining the fragments that arise through feelings, images, dreams, and body images, with what they can already remember from the past. It is through this process that many survivors are able to gain a better understanding of their emotional and spiritual struggles within the context of their past abuse, and to use that understanding to continue healing.
In her book, Fredrickson presents seven major methods for accessing dissociated memories which, like the holistic methods discussed by Landry and Thompson, all strive to work with all four levels of intelligence through various forms of “inner process” work. These retrieval techniques include: imagistic work, dream work, journal writing, body work, hypnosis, feelings work, and art therapy. While many abuse survivors may favor one or two of these methods over the others, most will find themselves working either intentionally or unintentionally with all of them at some point during their healing... abuse-related dreams can and will often arise, uninvited, during sleep and abuse-related feelings during a routine massage. While these experiences can be very disturbing at first, once a survivor begins to get a feel for how her/his subconscious is releasing the repressed memories and acquires some tools for working with them, s/he will become better able to manage the memories as they surface.
While Western medicine has traditionally addressed conditions such as dissociation and the many other aftereffects of sexual abuse in terms of “mental illness”, currently there is much research being done regarding the spiritual essence of these conditions and the possibility that many of them may actually be manifestations of various types of spiritual processes such as shamanic crises, Kundalini awakenings, and episodes of psychological renewal (Grof, 1989, p.13-14). Should some of the “mental illnesses” that result from sexual abuse indeed be manifestations of spiritual processes, certainly their treatment would require a much more holistic approach than what is currently advocated in most mainstream psychiatric hospitals and clinics. This holistic approach, by necessity, would include not only conventional psychological treatments but tools to assist the sexual abuse survivor in accessing the truth about her/his life, in speaking that truth to a compassionate witness, and releasing any “stuck” abuse-related energies from her/his overloaded energy system. It is in this way, by clearing out the negative energies related to past traumas and abuses, that individual abuse survivors as well as the whole of society will, in time, achieve the spiritual awakening our world so desperately needs to heal and thrive…indeed, the spiritual awakening that may be necessary for our world to survive.
Resources
Bonheim, J. (1992). The serpent and the wave, a guide to movement meditation. Berekely: Celestial Arts.
Chapman, C. (2010). How sexual abuse is spiritual abuse. Retrieved August 17, 2011 from:
http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Sexual-Abuse-Is-Spiritual-Abuse&id=5074112
Childhood sexual abuse: a mental health issue. (2006). Retrieved August 15, 2011 from:
http://www.heretohelpbc.ca/publications/factsheets/child-sexual-abuse
Edwards, M. (2011). Sexual abuse link to high rates of mental illness. Retrieved August 15, 2011
from: http://www.abc.net.au/news/2011-08-03/study-reveals-alarming-numbers-of-sexual-abuse/2822940
Fredrickson, R. (1992). Repressed memories, a journey to recovery from sexual abuse. New York: Fireside.
Kappas, J. (2001). Professional hypnotism manual, a practical approach to modern times. California: Panorama Publishing.
Grof, S. (1989). Spiritual emergency, when personal transformation becomes a crisis. New York: Putnam.
Landry, B. (2001). Healing from sexual abuse trauma with spirituality. Canadian Women’s Health Network. Retrieved August 17, 2011 from: http://www.cwhn.ca.en/node/39612
Maltz, W. (1991). The sexual healing journey, a guide for survivors of sexual abuse. New York: HarperCollins.
Tollefson, W. (1997). Separated from the light, a path back from psychological trauma. Cape Coral: Tollefson Enterprises.
Thompson, V. (2002). Spiritually healing abuse. Journey with spirit. Retrieved August 18, 2011
From: http://www.journeywithspirit.com/innerjourney_healing_abuse.htm
Wade, J. (2004). Transcendent sex, when lovemaking opens the veil. New York: Pocket.
by Lynda Wisdo, MA
(essay written for MA course in Sexuality and the Soul)
Copyright © 2023 All rights reserved.
Within all of the world’s major religions, there have been teachings that maintain that the body and spirit are two separate aspects of the human experience. Moreover, many of these teachings also maintain that sexuality and spirit are not only separate but aspects of our being that are at war with each other. In his gospel, the apostle Paul warns Christians that, “The desires of the flesh are against the spirit, and the desires of the spirit are against the flesh” (Bonheim, 1992, p.9). This proclamation, along with numerous others presented in many sacred texts, has convinced religious followers of all faiths that there can be no reconciliation between these two “battling forces” within us, a belief which has left many of the world’s devoted feeling separated from the experiences of their bodies. According to some more recent authors and researchers, however, and the beliefs of many ancient cultures, sexuality and spirituality are not separate but are instead intimately connected aspects of our being, aspects of our being which have been playing a vital role in the spiritual growth of individuals as well as in the evolution of all of humankind for thousands of years.
In the legend of Gilgamesh, ancient storytellers describe how it was through the energies of sexuality that the man-beast, Enkidu came to be transformed into a “god-like” or “spiritual” being, a transformation which then enabled Enkidu to enter the gates of the “civilized” world (Wade, 2004, p. 3). In her book, Transcendent Sex, researcher and author Jenny Wade, describes dozens of contemporary experiences of spiritual awakening and transcendence which have been occurring for people of all ages and from all walks of life through the simple act of lovemaking. Much like the enlightenment experiences of spiritual adepts, these sexual-spiritual events have included feelings of bliss, journeys to past life incarnations, and even glimpses of the face of God (Wade, 2004, p. 11-13). In addition to its ability to carry lovers into other realms of consciousness, based on theories presented by researcher Dr. John Kappas, human sexuality also plays a much more basic role in humankind’s day-to-day experiences, providing the energy behind the way each one of us expresses ourselves, not only in the bedroom but within every aspect of our being, from how we walk and talk, to how we dress, and even how we write our names (Kappas, 2001, p. 72).
When considering the many simple and profound ways in which the energies of sexuality are experienced within every aspect of human life, it becomes apparent that it is not something which is antagonistic to or even separate from spirituality but something to which spirituality is intimately linked, both of these energies informing and recreating each other as well as each one of us on an ongoing basis. Interwoven within this intimate link is a very distinct type of sexual experience, one which appears to be far removed from the transcendent experiences presented by Wade as well as from the evolutionary experience of Enkidu but, given the power inherent within sexual energies, is just as influential to our spirituality and the unfolding of creation--the experience of sexual abuse.
An all too common type of abuse, today statistics reveal that one in three to five women and one in seven to ten men will be sexually abused before the age of seventeen (2006, Rates of Sexual Abuse in Adults section, para 1). This means that at least 20% of underage girls and 10% of underage boys will experience any or all of the following events, either forcibly or coercively, at the hands of an adult, in most instances, an adult who they know and trust: exhibitionism, fondling or molestation, viewing of sexual acts or pornography, participation in pornography or prostitution, oral rape, sodomy or incest (2006, What is Sexual Abuse section, para 1). Because of the especially charged nature of sexual abuse and its ability to affect the most intimate aspect of our being--our soul aspect--the aftereffects of this type of abuse can be especially devastating, not only in how a survivor experiences her/himself inwardly but in how s/he relates outwardly in the world as well. For the most part, these aftereffects arise in a variety of challenges most commonly referred to in Western medicine as “mental illnesses”.
Depression. Anxiety. Bipolar Disorder. Schizophrenia. Substance Abuse. PTSD. These are just some of the “mental illnesses” that can result when an individual has suffered sexual abuse, a correlation which has been well documented and studied by some of the world’s most prestigious research centers. In recent studies conducted at the University of Melbourne and the University of NSW, researchers have found that the rate of mental illness in survivors of sexual abuse is up to three times that of the general population. As noted by Australian public health expert, Dr. Susan Rees, “…there’s a high association or a strong association between exposure to gender-based violence and all 3 broad classes of mental disorder-- so that includes mood, anxiety, substance abuse-- and a very high association with attempted suicide” (Edwards, 2011, para 1-3). In another study conducted in British Columbia, researchers have found that an overwhelming proportion of adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse, up to 95%, develop mental illness, at least half of these illnesses presenting as some form of PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and 40% as substance abuse (2006, Effects of Sexual Abuse section, para 1). Certainly, these numbers represent not only the startling statistics regarding the aftereffects of sexual abuse but more importantly, the very real struggles which affect the well-being of both individual survivors and our entire culture. Based on a decade- long study conducted at the Department of Preventative Medicine at Kaiser Permanente in conjunction with the US Centers of Disease Control, Dr. Vincent Felitti notes that “adverse childhood experiences (such as sexual abuse) are common, destructive and have an effect that often lasts a lifetime [and] They are the most important determinant of the health and well-being of our nation” (2006, para 4). Given the extent to which incidents of childhood sexual abuse have risen to epidemic proportions and the many ways in which their aftereffects are contributing to some of our most pressing individual and societal challenges-- challenges such as ongoing abuse/violence, poverty, crime and drug and alcohol abuse-- the need to effectively address this type of abuse as well as its aftereffects has become crucial, not only to the health and well-being of individual survivors, but to all of society.
While the majority of Western health practitioners have traditionally dealt with the aftereffects of sexual abuse in terms of various types of “mental illnesses”, there are many survivors, authors and even clinicians who, being aware of the intimate link between sexuality and spirituality, have come to view these struggles more in terms of “spiritual wounding”. In her online article, “How Sexual Abuse is Spiritual Abuse”, social worker, Cathy Chapman discusses the idea that because sexuality and spirituality are not only interconnected but also the two most sacred aspects of our being, when a person experiences sexual abuse s/he also experiences “spiritual violence” (2010, para 1). Chapman goes on to point out that because one of the most vital aspects of spirituality is the trust each believer has that s/he is connected to some sort of divine force, when that trust is broken, as it is in sexual abuse, the survivor becomes unable to feel that connection and as a result, has difficulty achieving a sense of “inner direction and power” in her/his life (2010, para 4). It is when this loss of “inner direction and power” becomes severe that the struggles or “symptoms” of spiritual wounding or “mental illness” become especially challenging.
In the book, The Sexual Healing Journey, an abuse survivor named, Angie describes her feelings of loss after her father insisted that she undress for him one afternoon when she was a teenager: “I felt like I no longer had power over anything. I had lost the power of protection over my own body…Sex came to represent domination, emotional pain, and a feeling of spiritual death” (1991, Maltz, p. 92-93). All too often treated like “sexual objects” by their perpetrators, many abuse survivors come to view themselves as being completely devoid of spirituality, their sense of themselves as “individuals with feelings, needs and rights” taken from them in order to fulfill the needs their abusers. Understandably, anytime an individual’s spiritual system of “inner direction and power” has been broken down by an episode or string of episodes of sexual abuse, any number of “mental illnesses” can result; the very basis of these illnesses being the deeper spiritual wounding that has been caused by the abuse and the connection between that abuse, the survivor’s sexuality and her/his spirit. Some of the “symptoms” or challenges that can arise as a result of the abuse survivor’s spiritual wounding or “mental illness” include: dissociative responses, sleep disturbances, flashbacks, concentration difficulties, memory problems, hyper-alertness, irrational guilt, sexual dysfunction, eating disorders, substance abuse, compulsive sexuality, self-destructive behaviors, self-mutilation, a tendency toward isolation, impaired self-esteem, depression, negative perceptions of the self and others, and a likelihood of attempting suicide which is twice as high as those without a history of sexual abuse (Dolan, 1991, p.5-6).
While, for the most part, Western medicine encourages the use of psychotropic medications, psychotherapy and psychiatric hospitalization as a way of dealing with many of the challenges faced by sexual abuse survivors, this approach is primarily “mind-centered” and far too often fails to address the ways in which the survivor’s body and spirit were also affected by the abuse. It is because of the way traditional psychotherapy often fails to address the body and soul aspects of the survivor that psychotherapist, Blanche Landry, also an incest survivor, decided to turn to a more holistic type of therapy in her efforts to heal from the aftereffects of her abuse. It was through this more holistic approach that Landry was encouraged to work not only with her mind during her healing but with her “heart, body and soul” as well. Based on her experiences with both traditional and holistic therapies in healing from the aftereffects of sexual abuse, Landry found the limits of traditional psychotherapy to include the following:
-Its emphasis on rational intelligence while excluding the other three types (physical, emotional and spiritual).
-Its emphasis on university-based training which relies primarily on concepts developed by
Freud, a man who did not believe his patients when they said they had been sexually abused
by their fathers and instead insisted that they were fantasizing (an attitude which still persists
today and which prevents an honest appraisal of the true impact of sexual abuse on the
individual, the family and on society).
-Its treatment of spirituality as “taboo”, an attitude which has also been influenced by Freud, in this case by his atheism. (2001, para 9-10).
Since it is through the body that the wounds of sexual abuse are inflicted on the survivor--on her/his mind, body and spirit--without question the body should also be included in the process of working to heal those wounds. By not addressing the body, it is my belief that, in some instances, traditional psychotherapy can actually work to maintain a state of dissociation in the survivor--a split between the mind, body and spirit which, as will be discussed later, may already be extremely problematic for many survivors.
In her online article, “Healing from Sexual Abuse Trauma with Spirituality”, Landry stresses the importance of giving the sexual abuse survivor the opportunity to work with all four types of intelligence--physical, emotional, rational, and spiritual--through a method she refers to as the “Psychological- Physical- Spiritual Approach”. In her article, Landry presents the numerous benefits that can be gained from working with this method and with the four types of intelligence in healing the wounds of sexual abuse as follows:
-Physical Intelligence- allows the survivor to get in touch with feelings, blocks, and traumas within the body.
-Emotional Intelligence- allows the survivor to acknowledge how s/he feels about her/his bodily sensations/reactions.
-Rational Intelligence- allows the survivor to observe and judge her/his experiences and make connections between the past and present.
-Spiritual Intelligence- involves the soul in helping the survivor to re-experience her/his wounds and live through them with a new state of awareness. (2001, para 13-14).
Naturally, when the survivor is given the opportunity to address all four types of intelligence in her/his healing through this type of multi-dimensional approach, s/he will stand a much better chance of achieving a sense of wholeness than when utilizing only the “mind-centered” approaches of traditional psychotherapy. This is not to say that the traditional approaches should not be utilized; as Landry emphatically points out, efforts to heal through the three other types of intelligence--physical, emotional, and spiritual--should be considered as complementary to the more traditional approaches which address the mind. Basically a “transpersonal approach” to healing, Landry’s “Psychological- Physical- Spiritual Approach” places much of its emphasis on the many benefits that can be gained through “inner process” work such as meditation and contemplation. It is through these “inner processes” that Landry believes the survivor will be best able to connect with her/his “divine essence”, a step she feels to be of the utmost importance when working to heal the deeper spiritual wounds of sexual abuse (2001, para 15).
Another way for the sexual abuse survivor to connect with her/his spirituality or “divine essence” is to utilize some of the “energetic approaches” to healing. According to Vicki Thompson in her online article “Spiritually Healing Abuse”, the energetic approaches are based on the theory that each one of us possesses an “inner energy network” which is comprised of four “energy fields” that surround the body and which connect us to the “divine healing energy”. Corresponding directly to the four types of intelligence described by Landry, moving outward from the body, Thompson describes this energy network as including the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual energetic fields or bodies--energy fields which are often presented in spiritual discussions as auras. According to Thompson, the intention when working with these energy fields is to release “old” and “stuck” energies that are related to the abuse so as to enable the survivor to reconnect with the energies of the higher- self or spirit. This type of energetic work is considered to be spiritual or transpersonal in that it focuses on dimensions which lie outside of or above the survivor’s everyday consciousness. As Thompson tells readers, it is by releasing the old, abuse-related patterns from the energy bodies that the survivor is able to “free up space” within her/his energy system and make room for the divine source of “spiritual healing guidance” to come in-- a process quite similar to deleting the old files on one’s computer in order to “free up space” for new ones (Thompson, 2002, para 1-7).
While there are many sexual abuse survivors who, being aware of their abuse histories, are able to make a connection between their mental and spiritual struggles and their abuse, there are a surprising number of survivors who cannot. This is because many survivors are unable to remember their abuse and are left only with its challenging aftereffects. These survivors are said to be struggling with a condition known as traumatic or dissociative amnesia or, if the abuse was especially severe, dissociative identity. Dissociation is described as “an extreme defense reaction to inescapable trauma” where survivors may have no memories at all of their abuse or even of entire periods of their childhoods (Dolan, 1991, 141). For these survivors, there are no incidents of abuse to cite as the cause for their struggles, struggles that, as mentioned earlier, may include nightmares, eating disorders, substance abuse, and tendencies toward self-mutilation and suicide. For the dissociated survivor, there are only the aftereffects of her/his abuse and the intense feelings of confusion and hopelessness that can result when no cause or treatment can be found for them.
In his book, Separated from the Light, founder and director of the Women’s Institute for Incorporation Therapy, Dr. William Tollefson, discusses how he sees the process that leads to a dissociative reaction as being one which is occurring on a soul or spirit level. Most basic to Tollefson’s model is his view of the way in which, unable to escape an act of abuse, the mind, body and spirit of the emotionally overwhelmed child will “link up” with her/his imagination to create an “alternative path for survival”. Once this alternative path is created, the mind, body and spirit “sever connections so that the traumatic physical and emotional pain happening to the body don’t register in the mind” (1997, p. 128). Even though this “splitting” of the self is done to protect and preserve the “core”--the most fundamental part of the “self”--because of the displaced containment of the memories and emotions related to the abuse as well as various manipulative tools used by the perpetrator, this “splitting” also creates a “conflicted relationship” between the divided aspects of the psyche. It is because of these conflicts, the unprocessed memories and emotions and the survivor’s inability to access and release them that, even though the dissociated survivor is unable to remember her/his abuse, the struggles of spiritual wounding still arise, often presenting even greater challenges than for the non-dissociated survivor who is able to recall the reason for her/his struggles.
It is important to keep in mind that the process involved in dissociation is one that happens on a continuum or graduated scale, the earliest stages such as day-dreaming being common to most everyone. During a classroom lecture, for instance, a state of simple boredom can lead a third grade student to imagine that s/he is flying high above the school on the wings of a gentle dragon, a dissociated state from which the child can easily return to ordinary consciousness. It is when a child is experiencing severe and/or repeated trauma, however, such as in sexual abuse, that the dissociative reaction continues along the continuum, forcing a compartmentalization of experiences to begin taking place within the psyche along with dissociated states which may take years to bring back into ordinary consciousness. Always a spiritual “rescuing” of the self, it is at the far end of the continuum where the dissociated survivor experiences what Tollefson refers to as a “multiplicity reaction”, formerly described as Multiple Personality Disorder and currently as Dissociative Identity Disorder. According to Tollefson, this extreme reaction occurs only if the victim has already experienced all of the previous stages along the dissociation continuum including: daydreaming, the dissociative reaction, out- of- body experiences, and compartmentalization and fragmentation-- all occurring primarily as the result of “sexual and physical abuse before the age of seven” (1997, p.138).
While there are many different ways of working with the distinct and difficult challenges caused by dissociation, there are no medications currently available that are able to address the dissociation directly, only some of its co-occurring conditions such as depression and anxiety. It is for this reason that many therapists advocate utilizing some of the more holistic methods such as those presented by Landry and Thompson when working with the dissociated survivor. One of these holistic-based therapists, Dr. Renee Fredrickson, director of Fredrickson Associates and co-director of Chrysalis Recovery Center, presents some of her findings in working effectively with dissociated sexual abuse survivors in her book titled, Repressed Memories, A Journey of Recovery from Sexual Abuse. In this book, Fredrickson discusses five types of memory which she believes make up the human memory system, a system which corresponds closely with the four types of intelligence and energetic fields presented earlier by Landry and Thompson. These types of memory include: Recall Memory, which is the memory process of the conscious or rational mind, Feeling Memory, which is the memory process of the subconscious/emotional mind, Body Memory, which comes from the subconscious/physical mind, and Imagistic and Acting-Out Memory which can be traced to the subconscious/spiritual mind (Fredrickson, 1992, p.88). According to Fredrickson, it is within the subconscious that all of the memories that the conscious mind is “incapable of storing” are stored. This includes early memories of events that happen before our Recall Memory is fully developed as well as memories of abuse that are “extremely traumatic”. Since very few dissociated survivors experience spontaneous Recall Memories of their abuse--memories that are accompanied by the “lived experience” of the events presented in a logical sequence-- traumatic memories which are stored within the subconscious can only be brought into conscious awareness through the subconscious forms of memory: Feeling, Body, Imagistic, and Acting-Out Memory. When any of these four types of memory begin to emerge, they usually emerge in combination and are experienced in the following ways:
Feeling Memory- as a “flood of inexplicable emotion”, usually surrounding
an issue or “trigger” related to the abuse.
Body Memory- as the physical manifestation of a past incident of abuse. For example, a
survivor’s legs may begin to shake as s/he is remembering the look on a perpetrator’s face.
Imagistic Memory- often arises as a memory that breaks through into conscious
awareness in the form of an image or “incomplete picture” of events, similar to a slide
show. (Also in dreams).
Acting-Out Memory- arises when a forgotten incident of abuse is spontaneously acted out in some way,
physically, emotionally or verbally. The most common form of this type of
memory is when an abuse survivor suddenly says something about her/his abuse that s/he
had no intention of saying. (Fredrickson, 1992, p.88-95).
Understandably, when fragments of past sexual abuse begin emerging from the subconscious through any one of these channels when there is still no conscious memory of that abuse, it can be extremely disturbing to the survivor, creating a type of “spiritual crisis” within her/his psyche. It is because of the unsettling nature of emerging dissociated memories that the dissociated survivor should always have adequate professional support during her/his healing. Because of the spiritual nature of the dissociation, as well as the deeply transformative potential of the emerging memories, it is in the best interest of the survivor that this support include someone with a background in managing spiritual and transformative crises related to past sexual abuse.
It is important to keep in mind that the dissociated survivor cannot force her/his memories to emerge. As pointed out by Fredrickson, “You can help your memories surface, but you cannot make them surface”. When memories do start to emerge, the task all survivors must undertake is to “piece together” a picture of their abuse history by combining the fragments that arise through feelings, images, dreams, and body images, with what they can already remember from the past. It is through this process that many survivors are able to gain a better understanding of their emotional and spiritual struggles within the context of their past abuse, and to use that understanding to continue healing.
In her book, Fredrickson presents seven major methods for accessing dissociated memories which, like the holistic methods discussed by Landry and Thompson, all strive to work with all four levels of intelligence through various forms of “inner process” work. These retrieval techniques include: imagistic work, dream work, journal writing, body work, hypnosis, feelings work, and art therapy. While many abuse survivors may favor one or two of these methods over the others, most will find themselves working either intentionally or unintentionally with all of them at some point during their healing... abuse-related dreams can and will often arise, uninvited, during sleep and abuse-related feelings during a routine massage. While these experiences can be very disturbing at first, once a survivor begins to get a feel for how her/his subconscious is releasing the repressed memories and acquires some tools for working with them, s/he will become better able to manage the memories as they surface.
While Western medicine has traditionally addressed conditions such as dissociation and the many other aftereffects of sexual abuse in terms of “mental illness”, currently there is much research being done regarding the spiritual essence of these conditions and the possibility that many of them may actually be manifestations of various types of spiritual processes such as shamanic crises, Kundalini awakenings, and episodes of psychological renewal (Grof, 1989, p.13-14). Should some of the “mental illnesses” that result from sexual abuse indeed be manifestations of spiritual processes, certainly their treatment would require a much more holistic approach than what is currently advocated in most mainstream psychiatric hospitals and clinics. This holistic approach, by necessity, would include not only conventional psychological treatments but tools to assist the sexual abuse survivor in accessing the truth about her/his life, in speaking that truth to a compassionate witness, and releasing any “stuck” abuse-related energies from her/his overloaded energy system. It is in this way, by clearing out the negative energies related to past traumas and abuses, that individual abuse survivors as well as the whole of society will, in time, achieve the spiritual awakening our world so desperately needs to heal and thrive…indeed, the spiritual awakening that may be necessary for our world to survive.
Resources
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Chapman, C. (2010). How sexual abuse is spiritual abuse. Retrieved August 17, 2011 from:
http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Sexual-Abuse-Is-Spiritual-Abuse&id=5074112
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http://www.heretohelpbc.ca/publications/factsheets/child-sexual-abuse
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from: http://www.abc.net.au/news/2011-08-03/study-reveals-alarming-numbers-of-sexual-abuse/2822940
Fredrickson, R. (1992). Repressed memories, a journey to recovery from sexual abuse. New York: Fireside.
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Landry, B. (2001). Healing from sexual abuse trauma with spirituality. Canadian Women’s Health Network. Retrieved August 17, 2011 from: http://www.cwhn.ca.en/node/39612
Maltz, W. (1991). The sexual healing journey, a guide for survivors of sexual abuse. New York: HarperCollins.
Tollefson, W. (1997). Separated from the light, a path back from psychological trauma. Cape Coral: Tollefson Enterprises.
Thompson, V. (2002). Spiritually healing abuse. Journey with spirit. Retrieved August 18, 2011
From: http://www.journeywithspirit.com/innerjourney_healing_abuse.htm
Wade, J. (2004). Transcendent sex, when lovemaking opens the veil. New York: Pocket.